8 Family Tips for the School Year
It’s back-to-school season and it has come in full force at the Teigen house! Our youngest is starting 10th grade, our daughter’s college courses begin, and Joanna is wrapping up her last few credits for her Ministry Studies degree.
With so many family members committed to their studies, it can feel like the pace goes from zero to sixty in an instant. We can feel overwhelmed as if all we’re doing is rushing from point A to point B. We realize that our quality time as a family will fall to the wayside unless we’re intentional about creating the time.
If this season of busy schedules and homework-filled days sounds familiar, or if you just want to be more intentional about making the most of every moment, we’ve put together a few of our family’s favorite habits for connecting during the school year.
Below are 8 habits and guidelines that can help as you start out this new school year (and all year long):
1. Put a cap on extracurriculars.
This one can be difficult because there are SO MANY opportunities and activities for our kids to explore, grow, and try new things. But it’s important to remember that every “yes” requires a “no” to something else. Practice asking yourself whether an activity will cost too much in terms of rest, focused homework time, family connection, and the “work” of childhood — open and creative play.
We’ve had to do this many times. This year we decided to say “no” to a volunteer ministry and “yes” to our life group at church. We said “yes” to youth group but “no” to a new extracurricular after school. By crafting a balanced calendar, we can honor the priorities God has set for our home and our hearts.
This may sound hard to accomplish especially if you suffer from FOMO or you feel pressure from others to participate. However, I promise once you begin to put this into practice, you’ll find you are less stressed, more focused, and able to honor the time and limits God has given you. And, today’s “no” might evolve into a “yes” at the right time and season in the future.
LISTEN: Episode 94: Simple Habits for Un-Complicating Life—with Brenda Yoder
2. Good mornings start with good nights.
How many times have we scrambled to find a missing glove or book before heading out the door to catch the school bus?
Now, we fold as much of the morning list into our bedtime routine as possible. Water bottles are prepped in the fridge. Clothes are laid out. Instruments or sports gear are bagged by the door. Our son even started cleaning his glasses when he brushes his teeth.
The steps we take at night sure save steps—and moods—in the morning rush! We recommend starting this habit over the weekend. At our house, we make smoothies and popcorn on Sunday nights so dinner prep is easy and we can focus our energy on the week ahead. It’s amazing how a few minutes of prep can ease the Sunday scaries and lighten your load.
3. Find peace in the predictable.
We don’t know about you, but it can feel like life is running us instead of the other way around. When the days get full, it helps a ton to cut the last-minute errands and decision fatigue by creating predictable patterns at home.
For us, this means that Wednesdays are always laundry day and Fridays mean a run to Trader Joe’s and the gas station. Mondays hold one-on-one prayer time for us as a couple. Tuesdays take us through the Chick-fil-A drive-thru after weekly appointments. The weeks might feel chaotic at times, but establishing a few consistent habits can cut the stress down to size.
What area of your life could be simplified by making it more predictable? Could you make a lunch schedule that you use week after week to eliminate the need to plan? What if you hired the neighbor kid to mow the grass for a season or brought in cleaning help once a month to get ahead of the chores? How you make your life predictable will be unique to your family life and breathe peace into your home.
4. Make little moments count.
During the school year, it can feel like a battle to stay close and connected. Gone are the summer afternoons at the beach and late nights roasting marshmallows around the fire pit. Yet there are still moments of quality time we can tuck into the moments of our day.
The morning commute or drop-off line might offer a couple of minutes to pray over your child. We like to make one morning a week for a donut day with Dad before school or chip away at a puzzle for just ten minutes in the evening. You’d be surprised how even something as simple as keeping a card game in the glove box while you’re waiting for a sibling’s lesson or practice to wrap up can create connection.
We like to place a note in their lunchbox or text them three reasons why they’re amazing. With a little creativity and intention, we can keep those bonds tight between us.
5. Ask for help.
When our days are crammed full, it’s time to lean on one another instead of dealing with hard things alone. Perhaps we can share some carpooling, exchange some babysitting hours, or trade freezer meals with a friend. Take advantage of the store’s grocery pickup service and your bank’s auto-pay. Hire a tween to play with your kiddos while you scrub the shower or answer emails. As a couple, be generous with hugs, a listening ear, and practical help when you’re hitting your limits.
We find great relief in taking our stress to God in prayer as well. Sometimes it’s all just too much, but He’s ready and waiting to hear all about it. We can ask Him for wisdom on how to simplify our days. When we’re anxious or frustrated, we can bring our needs to the feet of Jesus. He’ll reassure us that we don’t have to be all things to all people since HE is enough. As we care for our children, we can come to God as our Father who cares for us too.
6. Build in date nights.
While it’s crucial that we connect in meaningful ways with our kids, busy schedules can take a
toll on our marriage too. Conversations become more about the to-do list than the emotions,
needs, or burdens on our hearts. We become really good at delegating and getting things done,
but begin to feel we’re doing all those things alone.
That’s why regular date nights are a priceless gift to our relationship. We can get up to speed on
each other’s wins and struggles at work. On the ways we’ve heard God speaking through his
Word. On the decisions we’re weighing out or the plans we’re looking forward to. Dates can
create room to breathe and laugh and simply enjoy each other without an agenda to
accomplish.
For us, making time for our marriage takes a little creativity during the school year. Sometimes
we grab a bite during our son’s youth group meetings. Or we sneak off for breakfast while he’s
sleeping in on a Saturday. It might be a walk around the neighborhood after dinner or a coffee
date after an early school drop-off. With commitment and creativity, it’s possible to keep
growing your marriage all year long.
7. Plan ahead for school breaks.
Every Feburary it’s the same. We look out the window at icy streets and grey skies. Cabin fever
strikes with its fatigue and low moods that are hard to shake. We wonder, again, why we didn’t
see it coming and plan ahead for the winter break. We miss our chance to break out of the rut,
find some sun, and create memories together that last.
When you’re deep in the trenches of the semester, it’s a boost to the spirits to know your family
has something to look forward to. Maybe it’s the promise of seeing loved ones at the holidays.
Or exploring a new landscape over spring break. Maybe it’s a staycation where you find the
hidden gems in your city. Or taking that one-on-one trip with your child to mark a milestone
year in their life. By putting plans in place today, we can be sure to make the most of the time
we’re given to share with each other.
8. Moms and dads are growing too.
So much energy goes into helping our kids grow and thrive during the school year. We sign the
permission slips, buy the gear, and invest in the lessons. We show up for games and concerts,
volunteer in their classrooms, and sit by their elbow while they grind through their homework.
Yet while our kids are doing their hard work of learning and growing up, we are called to keep
growing too.
One of the best gifts we can share with our children is a flourishing faith of our own. How might
God be inviting you to move closer to him this year? Maybe it’s a Bible study at church or with
a friend. Perhaps it’s slipping away on Saturday mornings to be alone and pray. Maybe it’s
volunteering for that ministry that fuels your passion and uses your gifts. Or investing in a new
Bible and journal to simply sit at God’s feet each day.
When we pursue Jesus as the top priority in our life, we grow. God promises that as we abide in
him, we are made new. We find wisdom and discernment. We bear spiritual fruit that allows us
to move through our days with greater joy, peace, and patient love. We’re better able to cope
with whatever struggle and stress the school year might throw our way. And, our kids will see
how our faith in Jesus is transforming us before their eyes. Our lives become a witness to our
children of the power and love of God.
Our prayer is that the school year ahead will bring us closer to our children, in our marriage, and
to the One who created the life we share together.
We hope these tips will help you ward off the feeling of overwhelm and keep you connected as a family!
We know that, this time of year, it can feel like a new challenge is being thrown your way every day. On Monday, you’re wrestling with how to help your child balance fun and relaxation with homework and chores. On Wednesday, you go to bed realizing that, between work and driving kids to and fro, you and your spouse have only exchanged a few sentences all day.
During such a chaotic season, it can be so grounding to have a regular practice of prayer every day. That’s why we’d like to invite you to join our 30-day prayer journey.
Click here to join for free >>
God has so much planned for the school year ahead for you and your children. Even in the challenges, He is working to grow our strength and our trust in Him. His love will hold us every moment. We’re here and ready to offer friendship and prayer at any time—please use the button below to send us a prayer request! Blessings on you and your family this school year!
